Tigger the Dog has like, eighteen corners she checks for chipmunks every time she goes outside. And then she’ll check again, in case one popped up when she wasn’t looking. And then she’ll check again to make sure that while she was checking her previously checked spot, one didn’t pop up in the other previously checked spot. Tigger the Dog has an addiction. Just like me - only the dirt I’m digging in have chipmunks popping up in it unless they’re really cute or doing stupid tricks with dogs. My addiction is the Internet. Not really the whole Internet, just the same sites over and over again. I check them to see if there’s anything new. Then I check them again to see if any thing has changed since the last time I checked. It never has. But you can be sure that five minutes later, I will check them again to make sure nothing exciting has happened. And while I’m making confessions, I think I like my phone more than I like my dog. And that is just wrong. So, I’m quitting the Internet. No Internet and no Internet on my phone for the month of August. This means no Facebook or Twitter trolling for random information about who ate what and no Blind Gossip for stories about people I don’t know, will never know and really shouldn’t care to know what they might or might not be doing with themselves. I was going to try to go cold turkey but the world is a nightmare without connections, so I’m giving myself some rules: · I will continue to post to the blog. I challenged myself to a year of posts and that still stands. I just can’t check comments on Facebook or Twitter so if you have something to say, you’ll have to post it here. · I can check email and reply to email – if I get email that isn’t Deal of the Day ads from Angie’s list and warnings that I’ve spent more than my limit at the store. · I can use the maps feature to get where I need to. Without it I couldn’t get myself anywhere. Nashville is a mess of loops and wests and easts that make no sense without a calm voice telling me what to do next. · I can use my phone as a phone – though I’m honestly not sure how that works. And I’m only slightly kidding here. · I can, if need be, do a quick research scan for any of the projects I plan on doing in my free non-internet sucking time.
· And when Father-in-law is in town, there’s sure to be fascinating things about what he’s said or did that I’m sure I’ll share. What can be more entertaining than a Scottish bachelor coming to stay with his son and daughter-in-law in the south where food is conversation but we don’t cook and no one understands what he says? I’m also going to try to get him a date. See above for why that’ll be an amusing mess.
But other than those stipulations, I will not be on the Internet. I know that was pretty much like someone saying, “I won’t smoke unless I’m at the bar” when they work at a bar but for me, it’s a start. Prying my eyeballs away from the screen has to be good for something. I might even get one of my many projects done. I also know I’ve done this before, quitting the Internet, but never for this long and always as more of a lark. Before it was sort of, “I could if I wanted to. See.” But now it really is, “If I don’t stop this, I may end up in a dark room with no real friends and only virtual conversations with folks I’ve never met while I follow ‘news’ about people who’s lives are much more exciting that mine because they are outside in the real world.” I’m pretty sure that my life might be more exciting if I pull my fingers from the keyboard and my eyeballs from the screen, I might be able to breath into myself a bit more and figure out where in the world I should be heading. That is the hope. Know this though, if the world goes tits up, this Internet-Free attempt goes out the window, I will plant myself in front of my tiny screen to suss out all the useless little bits of useless information about the end of days that I can. Until that happens, good-bye Internet. If Husband can stop eating for three days, I can make it through the day without finding out what someone did for dinner or what funny/deep/meaningful thing George posted today. One month without Internet - challenge accepted. If this goes well, I might even give up TV. Who am I kidding? That is just crazy talk.
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AuthorMy name is ej. I'm a girl. I say that because with the short hair and the short initials, folks aren't always sure. More brilliant insights to who I am in About me Archives
April 2019
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