Like me my mother has no ability to remember song titles. None. Zip. Zilch. And like me, she can’t get the words to songs right either. If you’ve not seen this video of British comic Peter Kay talking about people singing the wrong words, please spend some time and watch it. It’s pretty much, me and the mom singing in the kitchen. Well, it is if all the songs Peter Kay suggested were found on jazz, blues or Broadway CDs. The mom and I can butcher the lyrics to a Broadway song like no other.
Anyway, I got this email from her Wednesday titled, ‘Song you might enjoy.’ In the body of the email she wrote the following: “…(Uncle) liked it enough to buy it (for 99c, I think). I don't have a copy. but the singer is Vince Gill and the title is How can I kiss your lips at night when you've been eating my ass out all day? Very country, and I may have the last part of the title off a bit. Very funny.” I’m sorry, Mom? Did you say I might enjoy a song called, ‘How can I kiss your lips at night when you've been eating my ass out all day?’ SAY WHAT???!!!??? And then she followed that whopper of a title up with - “Very country, and I may have the last part of the title off a bit.” YOU THINK, MOM? I know country songs cover some dark stuff but it's usually limited to booze and women. X-rated sex seldom makes it into a country song - let alone a title! "I may have the last part of the title off a bit.” Yeah, Mom. You got it off a little bit. The real title is: ‘It’s Hard To Kiss Those Lips At Night That Chew Your Ass Out All Day Long.’ How is it that my mom, my poor sweet mom who only knows about X-rated stuff because when I'm telling her stories about friends or stuff that celebrities are doing, we have to Google it, how is it that she came up with ‘HOW CAN I KISS YOUR LIPS AT NIGHT WHEN YOU'VE BEEN EATING MY ASS OUT ALL DAY?’ ??? Sure, 'eating' and 'chewing' are similar activities EXCEPT WHEN YOU'RE TALKING ABOUT ASSES!!! Because then you really want to be sure what you're talking about or the video of the song is going to be on YouPorn not YouTube. Now I have to explain to her what YouPorn is... “… eating my ass out all day.” Man, I love my mom! So. Dang. Funny.
0 Comments
Leave a Reply. |
AuthorMy name is ej. I'm a girl. I say that because with the short hair and the short initials, folks aren't always sure. More brilliant insights to who I am in About me Archives
April 2019
Categories
All
|