I’m following up yesterdays deep and celebratory post with an update on my teeth. Because I can and because I know you have all been worried about the state of my mouth and my eleven cavities and a root canal.
I sent my x-rays to Nicest Dentist Ever to look over and compare to the ones he took last time. Sunday, he’d sent me an email letting me know he’d call to discuss my “proposed treatment plan. In general, things don't look THAT serious or extensive!!!” Well, thank whatever lord you look up to, that things don't look that serious or extensive because I truly don’t know how I went from “Things look great! Keep it up.” with Sad Faced but Cheery Dental Hygienist and five minutes later New Dentist was all, “You have eleven cavities and need a root canal.” I mean, I eat badly but I do brush my teeth after I stuff my face with all those fats and sugars. And sometimes, I will even floss without something stuck in my teeth. Anyway, Nicest Dentist Ever called and we chatted and I DON'T NEED A ROOT CANAL YET just a filling will do!!! Pause for fireworks and cartwheels here. And, of the eleven cavities, ONLY ONE tooth really needs to have work done right now. The rest of the “cavities” have not actually penetrated the enamel to the dentin and with more regular flossing and a daily fluoride rinse, I should be okay for now. Pause for the big brass band, the flying acrobats and me running around the room screaming "Yes! Yes! Yes!" at the top of my lungs. Instead of fifteen plus visits to New Dentist and an approximate three thousand dollar out of pocket bill, I think I’m going to fly home at some point, see Nicest Dentist Ever and have the work done by him. Because really, no way in hell am I ever going back to New Dentist and her tooth fracking ways. And, as I said before, Nicest Dentist Ever is the NICEST DENTIST EVER! Tiny rant here: How dare New Dentist and others like her take advantage of people like me. Trusting in her expertise that she instead use for evil. And I’m not just talking about dentists. I’m talking about everyone who knows you need something and will inflate the need or urgency for their own gain. The plumber that comes to your house and takes a clogged drain and turns it into an urgent need to get your house totally repiped and you have to take out a second mortgage to get it done. The car mechanic that tells you the knocking you’ve heard is the transmission dying or the oil seizing or something equally bad and expensive and hard to verify in your moment of need. The insurance companies that scare you into buying policies that are useless when it comes to any accident you actually have or if you ever need your stupid teeth worked on because they cover NOTHING. You spend the money and you never know for sure if it was worth it, if they were telling you the truth or if you have just been scammed. It’s an awful feeling to not know. And it’s even worse feeling when you find out that you have indeed been conned and there is nothing you can do but wish plagues of awful things on them and their stupid ass faces. Which brings me to my boob. Next week, I’m getting a six-month check-up on my right boob to make sure it hasn’t mutated into something they say I’ll “have to do something about right now.” Do you think Nicest Dentist Ever can look at those x-rays too? I’m sure his many years looking at anomalies in teeth has given him the expertise to see any possible anomaly in my boob. Boobs and teeth aren’t that different, right? I’m actually starting to think I’ll go to him for everything that’s wrong with me. And I do mean every little thing. I trust him way more than the lady that “found my womb” two years after I had a womb-ectomy. Seriously. Or the doctor that told me I had possible appendicitis and had me take lots of very expensive tests and, when my possible appendicitis turned out to be VEG (Very Expensive Gas), just handed me a pamphlet and told me to look up possible causes online. Ass. Nicest Dentist Ever would never do that. Aside from Husband, I think he is the only one that will ever tell me like it is - but in a much, much nicer way than Husband ever would. So, at what point do you think Nicest Dentist Ever will take out a restraining order against me…?
2 Comments
ej
7/2/2014 07:26:09 am
Bear, you're funny! Husband knows the difference between my boobs and my teeth - one of them he likes honk and the other he tells me has broccoli stuck in it.
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AuthorMy name is ej. I'm a girl. I say that because with the short hair and the short initials, folks aren't always sure. More brilliant insights to who I am in About me Archives
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