When we first bought our California house, Husband was all excited about our TV room den. I called it the Man Fort. He plotted out the wiring to accommodate a projector, speakers and the TV. He cut a hole in the closet just outside the room so the projector could live in the closet and the noise from the fan would be at a minimum. The projector screen was hidden behind a beam. The chairs were bought and set in the space at the perfect viewing angle – only two of them because the room was that small. Lights were placed behind the TV for effect. Folks that came to the house were treated to an ”oooh” and “ahhh” tour of the equipment. They were invited to sit in the chairs and ‘experience’ the room, the sound, and the light. He was in heaven.
But then those toys were out of date and so he upgraded from a simple classroom pull down screen to a fancier one. He upgraded he projector to a bigger, better, brighter one. He upgraded the chairs from stationary black ones to red ones that swiveled. He built a wooden wall to highlight the TV and make it look like an art piece when it was off. Husband was happy with his Man Fort again.
I was wrong. Husband planned to make the den in this house into the new Man Fort. The den with a sagging linoleum floor, dark wood paneling and glass doors to the falling down deck that didn’t close or touch the walls and let in copious amounts of weather and bugs. It was an utter mess. I didn’t see this ever looking like the Man Fort of his dreams - until now.
We - okay mostly Husband – have spent the last year fixing it up. We had new windows put in. We installed a new floor – okay, Husband installed the new floor, joists and all. All this was happening at the same time as Husband remodeling the kitchen. And now, with the list of to-do’s in the kitchen still wanting – grout, lights, under cabinet lights, hooking up the stove - Husband has spent the last few days finishing up the new Man Fort. He’s hooked up the speakers in the ceiling. He’s hooked up the stereo and the TV. We got the new couches delivered and he’s got them at the optimum-viewing angle. The Man Fort was looking good.
And then, this past weekend, Husband started playing with his new fancy projector and his new even fancier projector screen. This one has a remote control up and down feature. Cue your “ooohs” and “ahhhs” people. He was excited to get it mounted. He prepped the space for the installation. He measured and poked and taped and did lots of screwing of pieces of wood for him to install the screen to. And then Husband asked me to help him take the projector screen out of the box it came in. Because of my back was having an episode of hating me, he asked me to just stand and hold the box and keep the box from moving and scratching the floor.
I did just as he asked. I held the box as he pulled on the screen.
He pulled. I held. He pulled some more. I held some more – and holding was hard because of the angle and my back and the fact that the screen wasn’t coming out easily. It was almost out and I was having a hard time keeping the box still. Husband yelled, “Hold it!” I held it! At no point did he tell me to hold the projector screen. So I didn’t. He pulled, I held - and the screen pulled right out of the box, bounced hard on the floor leaving a few dings and possibly breaking the screen.
So folks, when you come by for the tour of the house and we get to the Man Fort and he’s asking you too “oooh” and “ahhh” over the projector screen, make sure to look down at the floor for the dings. I did that.