Every birthday, Christmas, anniversary, hallmark holiday, random Wednesday, I’ve asked for a new spread. But Husband can’t have bright bedspreads in a “place of calm” and so we’ve got beige and boring.
Before Husband, I had bright bedspreads with flowers and shapes and large blocks of garish colors. I miss them. My bedroom was a mix of colors and styles - much like the inside of my brain or my thought process. There was nothing calm about it. I didn't sleep well but that's beside the point.
But then miracle of miracle, he told me yesterday he is actually looking into getting new bedding. I KNOW!!! I about squealed when he mentioned it. I didn’t because I didn’t want to scare him off but inside, inside I was doing the wiggly dance of joy. I was picturing colors and patterns and maybe a paisley swirl or two. I was imagining going to sleep our new bedroom and all the crazy psychedelic dreams I was going to have...
And then, last night, he told me he’d found a possible replacement for beige and boring. I started the party in my head. And then he showed me this!
And laughing. And laughing. Because those are the same f***ing sheets. Sure, they're grey and the lines are bigger. Sure, the quality is likely to be better than Ikea’s but seriously?!? That is the same sheet. SAME!!!
“It’s nothing like it...” he kept saying, as I’m laughing and gasping for air. “It’s nothing like it...” as the tears were streaming down my face and my colorful dreams were dying.
What was I thinking? Husband suddenly changing the sheets from beige and boring to vibrant - like in what world would that happen? The kind of world where I am sane and never worry about anything? A world where I never ever second and third guess a decision? A world where the presidential candidates and politicians suddenly wake up and realize if they don't play nicely with others, we're going to be in a war with everyone and not just ourselves? Yeah, we don’t live in that world. We live in a world where we've had the same beige and boring bedding for twelve years.
But it's the kind of world where our color and patterns and crazy comes from the people in it. Where our lives are the farthest thing from boring because suddenly we're parents to three dogs who apparently can't just lie quietly in the corner until I'm ready to play with them but MUST play right now. A world where that man I married is constantly surprising me - and not always in a good way.
Some days, I'd prefer colorful bedding... But then I'd have nothing to say.